Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Long Time, No Post

"Mitesh, you haven't posted in a little while.
Get off my case man! Don't you see. It's all an illusion. This whole b-logging thing. It's not real, man.
Mitesh, have you been doing mushrooms again?
Mushrooms are for the weak! I'm drinking fairy dust."

So fairy dust has been the plight of my blog. I've realized that the better my life is, the less I want to talk to you. HA! No really. I don't have any excuses for not writing other than uninspired phraselogy, boring topics and sheer laziness. So now that I'm at the bottom of this bottle of fairy dust, I think I'm gonna start writing again.

I've come across a phrase I really like: "Unicorns and Ambrosia". Use it in a sentence you say?

Boats and ambrosia are interchangable

"How's everything today, Mitesh?" ... "Everything's unicorns and ambrosia, man. Definitely U and A." This actually replaced my not too heralded and oft misused phrase of 'totally tits'. For some reason I'd always mess up it's usage. Like in the above "How's everything today, Mitesh?"... "Everything's totally tit. Thanks for asking." Is a very acceptable usage. But for some reason I always ended up in situations like this. "Mitesh, I heard your grandma died."... "Totally mutha-fuckin' tits!"
Not good. You tend to lose a lot of friends and befuddle family members.

I saw Wolfmother this weekend. Sometimes I think rock and roll is dead. Then once a year or so I see a band and think... "Fuck yeah! These guys have testicles!"

Here's the basic recollection I have from the show.
Lead singer: Greatest fro ever (better than Napoleon Dynamite)
Bassist/Keyboadist: Jumps a lot
Drummer: No one ever loves drummers.
Lead Singer again (also neglected to mention he plays guitar): Are you playing guitar or just wailing hellasish tunes on your cock?
Bassist/Keyboadist: How do you not fall down or fly? Sometimes you make me feel like I'm in outer space when you tweak your sounds.

So Wolfmother ruled. But there was a group called "Krisis". The K makes them cool. Sometimes when you win the battle of the bands in high school you're not really that good. In fact, there's a good chance that people took pity on you because they thought that the lead singer was blind or a girl or something. But when you suck worse than the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever did suck, then you know you should get a job at McDonald's and really pursue your life long dream of not sucking. Whew! About 1/3 of the way through I wanted to gauge my eyes with a fork. But then when I could still hear them. Then I'd freak out because they'd still be the worse sounding than some bowel movements I've had... AND now I have no eyes. Not good.

That's pretty much my life. I hope you're enjoying. BTW, the girls at the show were plenty cute. Fun to flirt with. Even if it was only for a few minutes.


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